I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
