also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
