Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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