how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
