Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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