Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
