Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
