"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
