It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
