thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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