That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
