I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
