from now on my penis is your penis
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
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