Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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