Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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