Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
