im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
