I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
