i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
