he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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