Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
