I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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