I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
