I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
