So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
