She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
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