This girl is more easily done than said...
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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