STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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