Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
