tell your sister to shave her snatch
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
