i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
