worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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