Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
