You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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