it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
