Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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