its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
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