You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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