my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
