Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
