i don't like sucking hair
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
