if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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