Cold hands, warm shart.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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