ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
