Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
