I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
i think i just naturally attract stoners
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
