It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
