what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
