ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
