5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
