Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
